Thrown off.

I think I'm too much a creature of habit. I'm amazed at myself in how easily I can be thrown off if my normal day is disturbed even the slightest bit.

My parents are in town for Thanksgiving. We're at my house. I can still do all the things I normally do. Yet, for some reason, just having them here puts me in this fog where I'm just eating like garbage.

Why am I eating these animal crackers? I don't really like animal crackers. Yes, I want a cheeseburger WITH fries, what are you nuts?

I feel like the kind of guy who can do things just fine on his own, but when people are around, he falls to pieces. Instead of it being something stupid like juggling or playing that Beetles so you just learned on the guitar, for me it's eating.

Today's a Holiday

I was hoping to write something Thanksgivingy, but looking at some of the headlines today, that's a bit difficult:

"TERROR AT THE TAJ"
"PLAN TO BOMB PENN STATION"
"Feds warn of terror plot against NYC subways"
"Russia to complete Iran nuclear plant in 2009"
"'TWILIGHT' STAYS TOP OF BOXOFFICE"

Today, if you're with family, might be a good time to enjoy their company and let a few grudges go.

If you're alone, go to a movie and sit right next to someone even though there's plenty of empty seats.

Ow, my back.

I'm starting to believe that a lot of pain is a result of weakness. I'll give you a couple of examples that I've seen in myself.

I used to have lower back pain. There were about 4 or 5 instances a year where my lower back would just give out. I wouldn't be able to move for a few moments and then there would be a lingering pain for several weeks.

A couple of years ago, I started doing CrossFit which involved a lot of deadlifting and squats. Both were exercises I've never really done because I had been lead to believe they put undue strain on the knees and back. I did them anyway because I was interested in the program and the results I saw in people.

After several months, of deadlifts, squats, power cleans and so on, I noticed that I hadn't had any problems with my back in a while.

Another example, earlier in this year I'd hurt my shoulder. I babied it for a while and it didn't seem to get better. I'd gain some mobility and then sleep on it wrong and wake up in pain. I even modified my sleeping habits so that I spent the entire night off of my left side in hopes that it would help. Nothing.

I don't remember why, but it occurred to me that I hadn't done overhead squats in quite a while and decided to give them a try. Every day for a month I would do two sets of five with 45lb bar. Now, I'm at about 90% to normal.

That's when it dawned on me that on two occasions now I've been able to treat pain by strengthening the areas that were giving me problems. This is just one of those things where you discover something that a lot of people already knew and then feel smart until people say, "Yeah, I know. What, are you just figuring this out?"

Monster Jobs.

Warlord, now that is an awesome job title. I know they are responsible for horrible things, but it just sounds good. I think it would really shine on your resume.

If you have warlord in your resume, it lets the interview know that you have organizational skills, work well under pressure, and have a strong leadership ability.

If you're looking for a new job, put warlord down and reason for leaving would be "revolution". It's not like they can call your previous place of work to verify.

What do you want? A Happy Birthday?

I don't make a big deal out of birthdays anymore. My own or other people who are close to my age. It's nothing against you. I just think celebrating birthdays being made into a huge deal belongs to children.

If you're over the age of 21, Why are you keeping count? The answer to "are you old enough to..." is yes.

But, you have to be 25 to rent a car. You know what, I'll give you up to 25. After that, stop counting. You really have nothing to look forward too. If you're younger than 62, you don't even need to count down to social security.

I know you think it's your special day, but let's look at the math. There's over 300 million people in the United States. That means, every day over 821,918 people are celebrating their very own special day. And that's only in this country. World wide it's closer to 18,088,285 a day. Sure, most of those people aren't having cake and many probably wish they hadn't been born, but still, it is their birthday.

So, if say your birthday were yesterday, and you noticed you didn't get some "Happy Birthday" comment from me that of a slice of cake that sparkled, just know that it's not that you're not a special person. I just don't do that.

Stupid, I know.

I find it strange the the older I get, the older my friends become. I don't mean, hey, I'm 30 and now my friends are 30.

When I was 20, most of my friends were also in their twenties but I also had some friends that were 30. Now that I'm 30, most of my friends are around thirty, but I've also got friends that are around 50.

Should this trend keep up, by the time I'm 40, I'll be chillin with my nursing homies.

Say that again.

My son's been watching these PreSchool Prep DVDs. They're to help teach him basics like shapes, colors, letters and numbers. They seem to work well because he can identify many colors and shapes now.

It works thru repetition and animation. For example, an octagon will be on screen as an animated character jumping rope and swinging on monkey bars while the whole time repeating "Octagon. Octagon. Octagon. Octagon." Then the octagon will become just the shape and again "Octagon. Octagon. Octagon."

The child learns the words, but strangely, if you're in the same room, the words start to lose all meaning and just become strange sounds.

"Octagon. Octagon. Octagon. That sounds funny. I wonder who first said that. Oc-ta-gon. Octagon."

Pick these up if you have a kid about 1 - 3 years old in your life or if you know some serious pot heads.

Yo Ho Yo Ho

Well, I'll be damned. Obama is going to have to deal with pirates. Bush got terrorists which was like a Rambo movie, but pirates is a whole new world of fantasy action. Fucking pirates! This should make for entertaining news coverage. Arrrrrr!

You've got pirates hijacking some pretty important ships and then demanding ten millllllion dollars.

I'm sure they're actually just fun loving and misunderstood guys who swagger around and drink and say catchy things like "You're off the edge of the map, mate. Here there be monsters." At least, that's what I've been lead to believe by Disney.

To avoid the phone from a government official asking me how to handle this, I'll just go ahead and tell them.

Get some ships that have run their coarse and are destined to become reefs. Pretty them up and make them look important. Rig them with explosives and send them out to look sexy for pirates. When they get hijacked, KABOOM!

Three or four ships sink to the bottom dragging some pirates into Davey Jones' Locker, and it'll no longer seem like a good idea.

Anyone else fake shocked?

Holy crap, Wanda Sykes is gay?
Actually, I should have guessed that when something she said made me laugh.

My favorite quote was where she said, "I was just living my life. Not necessarily in the closet, but I was living my life." You mean, you were just being a normal person who didn't identify yourself by who you have sex with? That's refreshing.

I just hope that this isn't her invitation to begin every sentence with, "As a lesbian".

Then again, if she did it wouldn't really change the entertainment value for me. The only time I really ever see Wanda is on Curb Your Enthusiasm. On that show, she plays herself, but not gay. I wonder if that's difficult...